Breaking Free from the 9-5: Redefining Success and Creating Your Own Path

Can you relate to this?

You wake up, hit snooze a few times, and drag yourself out of bed, already dreading another workday. You check your inbox before even getting out of bed, feel the weight of deadlines and expectations, and wonder: Is this it? You’ve followed the path you were told would lead to success—go to school, get a stable job, work hard, save for retirement. But deep down, something feels off. You crave more freedom, more fulfillment, and a life that actually excites you.

I stayed in my non-profit fundraising and even career for 16 years, always dreading the work week, not wanting to get out of bed in the morning. I cried ALOT.

The money wasn’t great. I wasn’t passionate about what I was doing. I didn’t feel fulfilled.

I honestly thought I wasn’t capable of feeling joy.

I was great at my job, so why wasn’t I happy.

And what else was I even passionate or qualified to do. I needed stability, right? My family and friends expected me to stay in a 9-5 job, because that is what you’re supposed to do, right? Health insurance. 401K, steady paycheck. The American Dream cloaked in the “rat race” and the coveted ladder climbing promotions.

The fear of leaving the 9-5 world is real. You wonder if it’s reckless to walk away from “security.” What if you fail? What will people say? 

Here’s what we all need to admit to ourselves: security isn’t about staying in a job that drains you. Real security comes from trusting yourself to build a life that aligns with who you are and what you truly want.

You are your own security. It’s already built inside you. There is no right or wrong way of living your life – only your way or someone else’s. 

If this resonates with you, you are in the right place. Around here, we live life our own way. We create the life we want to experience. You are the only one you need to answer to, the only one that you are accountable to. The only opinion that matters. 

If you’ve been feeling the pull to break free, but are scared to take the leap, this is for you. Let’s challenge the old beliefs holding you back and redefine success on your terms.

1. The Conditioning We’ve Been Taught About Success & Security

Everything we “know” about how to live our lives, the choices we make, where to put our efforts, we learned from a young age. Our thought patterns, beliefs, mindset have all been conditioned from what we’ve heard, witnessed, learned from our friends, family, teachers, community, religion. We embodied what a “successful” life looks like, what we should be striving for, what is acceptable to achieve. 

Starting from when we are little kids, we are conditioned to believe that success follows a predictable formula:

  • Go to school and get a degree.
  • Land a stable job with benefits.
  • Work hard and climb the corporate ladder.
  • Retire comfortably after decades of employment.

In this formula, success also looks like a traditional marriage, a house in the suburbs with a white picket fence and 2.5 kids plus a dog and maybe a goldfish. Add in a few vacations per year and enough money to buy everyone gifts for the holidays.

This narrative was passed down by generations before us—ones that valued job security above all else. But, let’s be honest, times have changed. A 9-5 job is no longer the only path to success, and for many, it’s not even a secure one. We witnessed this through COVID, and in the USA, we are seeing massive layoffs even now. Layoffs, burnout, and lack of fulfillment are common, yet we’re made to feel like breaking away from this model is irresponsible or risky.

The truth? The real risk is spending your life in a job that drains you instead of building something that excites you.

2. Redefining Success on Your Own Terms

When I left my 9-5, one of the hardest questions that I’ve struggled with is: “what does success actually look like to me?”

Untethering ourselves from the conditioned definition of success and actually allowing ourselves to define it is not as easy as it sounds.

Recently I decided I wanted to sell my home. I’m 45. I built it at 36. According to traditional “success” measures, I had made it! I owned my own home. My own little piece of land. The idea of selling it and moving back into an apartment took months to grapple with. Was I a failure because I was giving up my house? What did it say about me that I no longer wanted to spend the money on maintainance. That I wanted to spend more time traveling and enjoying life. It sounds freeing now, but in the moment, I felt like I had failed. That I couldn’t make it like all the other people that were happily owning and caring for their homes.  

I had to shift my mindset onto what I was creating for myself. Not what I was giving up, or how I measured up to some arbitrary definition of succes. 

Ask yourself – if you strip away the expectations of family, society, and your inner critic—what do you truly want?

  • Freedom to set your own schedule?
  • The ability to create something meaningful?
  • More time for yourself, your passions, and your family?
  • Financial independence on your own terms?

Success is not one-size-fits-all. Many women have walked away from their 9-5 jobs to create fulfilling, profitable, and purpose-driven businesses. Whether it’s coaching, freelancing, consulting, writing, or starting an online business, there are endless possibilities beyond the corporate world. The first step is giving yourself permission to want more. And sometimes more is giving up what you have to make room for what “more” you want to invite in.

3. Overcoming the Biggest Fears Holding You Back

The truth is you are 100% capable of going out after your dream, breaking free form 9-5 and creating the life, business, career that you deeply desire.

That isn’t the problem here.

It’s fear. It’s going against the norm. It’s the unknown. It’s the path few take. You mayy not even know anyone in your friend or family circle that has dared to pave their own path.

So let’s jump in and address the fears keeping you stuck:

Fear of Instability
  • Many believe a 9-5 is the safest option, but job security is an illusion. You can be laid off at any time. Your company can close down or merge with another. Building your own income streams can be more secure than relying on an employer. 
  • Consider diversifying your income sources—starting a side hustle, investing, or learning new skills that give you financial flexibility. When you start to see that money can come from anywhere, that there are possibilities, you can see where you can build other “safety nets.”
  • Research others who have successfully made the leap. Seeing real-life examples can help shift your perspective on what’s possible. Join a group of people building a business you dream about building. Surround yourself with those that are doing what you want to be doing. 
Fear of Failure 
  • Failure isn’t the end—it’s feedback. Every entrepreneur and successful business owner has failed at some point. The key is learning and adjusting as you go. You are going to fail, have some missteps, take some detours. It’s not really a failure, it’s just you getting your sea legs in this new venture. You’re learning what works and what doesn’t and not hitting the mark just means you need to keep going, tweak, and adjust.
  • Shift your mindset from “What if I fail?” to “What if I succeed beyond my wildest dreams?” There’s a 50/50 chance of both, so why choose to focus on the one that’s just a bummer to entertain. Most of the time in your life, you eventually succeeded. You may just remember the success and not the journey, so you’re subconscious is just remembering the glory and not the fight. You fail until you succeed, so just lead with you will succeed at some point and it will be amazing!
  • Small, calculated risks can help you gain confidence. Start by testing your ideas on a small scale before going all in. No one is telling you that you need to jump in and live a whole new life and business today. Your nervous system will never be able to handle that. Baby steps. You’re equally proving to you and the world that you have what it takes. Start small. One step will build your confidence. Then the next will build it even more. Until the uncomfortable becomes comfortable. 
Fear of Judgment
  • Not everyone will understand your decision to leave a traditional job, and that’s okay. Their fears don’t have to become yours. Their opinion has nothing to do with what they believe you are capable of. It’s from their own perspective, what they would be wiling to do, and their own fear of failure and lack of confidence in themselves.
  • Surround yourself with people who uplift and encourage you. Seek out entrepreneurial communities where taking risks and following dreams is the norm. I love the saying about how people that are ahead of you, out there going out after their dreams, aren’t the ones that are judging you. Find those people. They are too busy seeing that it’s possible to be judging what you are embarking on. Also, hire a coach. Your coach KNOWS you are capable of your dream and will help you find more weight in your own validation so that you don’t worry about what others have to say.
  • Ask yourself: “Am I living for their approval or for my own fulfillment?” I love that. You’ll never be fulfilled trying to make others happy with your choices. But your own approval will lead you to a life you are PROUD of!

Here is a great article in THE JOURNAL: BREAKING FREE FROM THE FEAR OF JUDGEMENT.

Fear of “Not Being Enough”

Here is a secret: You will never feel like you know, are, or have enough to get started or succeed. It’s old conditioning that tells us that we need certain levels of education, knowledge. Formal training to embark on a career. There’s always going to be this inner voice that wonders if you are missing secret knowledge that everyone else knows. Truth is, everyone is winging it! 

The difference between you and those you see out there rocking it in similar businesses – they keep showing up and sharing what they know NOW. They are meeting themselves where they are now. Then they learn more along the way and build from there. 

  • You don’t need all the answers or a perfect plan. You learn as you go. If you have a passion and a willingness to grow, you’re already more prepared than you think. Right now, it’s about getting started, not building an empire. 
  • Confidence is built through action. Start before you feel ready, and watch how much you grow along the way. Lead with the mindset that this is all a learning opportunity. This is a journey, not about the destination. 

4. The Three Pillars to Making This Happen

I am going to share with you the 3 pillars that will help you break free from the 9-5 and build your own path. 

They are 3 SIMPLE ingredients that have the biggest impact on creating the life and business you desire.

Clarity – Knowing What You Want 
  • Identify what excites you and what kind of life you want to create. 
  • Ask yourself: What do I really want? What kind of impact do I want to make?
  • Explore different possibilities without pressure—side projects, freelance work, or online business ideas.
  • Take time to journal or meditate on what fulfillment looks like for you—your answers might surprise you.

Think of it like a GPS, you need to know exactly where you want to go in order to create the path towards it. You can’t just put “start a business” in and come up with a roadmap. Nope. You need to know what it looks like, why you want it, what it will give you the ability to do in your life. You have to know the impact you want to make, why you are passionate about it. 

Don’t skip this part. Really tap into what your heart and soul truly want – without taking into account your fears, doubts, or what others expect you to do or will think of your dream. You deserve to choose what you want for YOU.

Confidence – Trusting Yourself & Taking the Leap
  • Confidence isn’t about being fearless—it’s about taking action despite the fear. It’s about daring to try something new, get uncomfortable, be open to learn so that you learn more about yourself and what you are capable of. You have to start somewhere. You can’t be an expert at something you haven’t done before. If you want to build confidence you have to prove to yourself that you have everything you need to step out of your comfort zone and figure things out.
  • Reframe self-doubt: Instead of “Who am I to do this?” ask, “Why not me?” The first will zap your motivation, and have you filtering your thoughts through fears and doubts. The latter will have you focusing on all you have to offer, all your skills, talents, and gifts that make you RIGHT for your dream life and business. This simple mindset shift will ignite your confidence.
  • Surround yourself with people who have done what you want to do—it proves it’s possible. When you are watching and learning from people doing what you want to be doing, it reminds you it is doable, that you have support, and that people just like you made it happen even when they had limiting beliefs and fears, 
  • Set small, achievable goals that help build momentum. Celebrate each win, no matter how small. Don’t wait for the big dream to happen, stay focused on the progress you make each day – something new you learned, that one person read your email, that you wrote your first blog, that you signed up for a new class. Small steps are the building blocks to the big dream and when you celebrate your small steps, you keep igniting a new level of confidence. 
Direction – Creating an Aligned Plan
  • You don’t need a perfect plan, just a starting point. The plan to get where you want to be is created by small steps you take. It requires you to start somewhere. There is no perfect plan because as you start taking action you’ll be gathering information about what you do and don’t like, what you need to learn more of, what you want to shift and change. Start with a simple 90 day plan (here is a link to the BECOMING planner and journal that will help you navigate that plan).  You can do anything for 90 days. Then after the 90 days, reassess and then create a new plan.
  • Map out small, strategic steps to transition out of your 9-5. You have to get your first client in order to get your first 20, so be strategic on how you will focus on one paying client at a time, one order, one client, one email subscriber. Your plan should be doable and be created to build momentum. 
  • Start building momentum while still in your job—test ideas, save money, and network. Set yourself up for success. What do you need to have in place to build something sustainable, feel secure, and start seeing results in your business?

5. How to Start Untethering from the 9-5 Mindset

One of the biggest shifts that need to happen is the mindset shift from 9-5 employee to CEO of your own business.  Here are tips on how to start making small shifts into our new role:

  • Challenge old beliefs – Start questioning what you’ve been taught about success and security. It’s time to see things from a different perspective. Change the narrative in your head. Define what success will look like for you. What do you need to feel secure? Then think outside the box on what that will look like, how you can create that for yourself. Give yourself permission to see things differently than you have been previously conditioned.
  • Experiment with side income – Try freelancing, consulting, or an online business before quitting. While you have a job, test the waters. Start your business. Start getting clients. Act as if you are already an entrepreneur. On your days off, pretend it’s day in the life of a business owner – what does that day look like, how are you spending your time to find clients? Start seeing how it feels to accept money from clients and bring in revenue. 
  • Build a support system – Surround yourself with entrepreneurs and like-minded women who encourage your growth. Start connecting in like-minded groups. Find groups where people are in the same industry, have similar goals. Start to build your network beyond the reach of your current community. 
  • Shift from employee mindset to entrepreneur mindset – Instead of looking for permission, start creating your own opportunities. This is YOUR show! You are the one making the decisions. You get to decide what it looks like for you, how you spend your time, how you work with clients. One of the hardest mindset shifts is to entrepreneur because there is no job description to follow. You get to create that for yourself. 
  • Learn financial literacy – Understanding money, investments, and cash flow can give you more confidence in your decision to transition. I can’t emphasize this enough. Fall in love with money. Get to understand how it works, how to budget, how to save and invest. You don’t want to be afraid of money in business or you will push it away and not accept in clients. You want to embrace it. You want to lead with an abundance mindset. 
  • Take one brave action each week – Whether it’s reaching out to a mentor, setting up a business idea, or even announcing your decision to leave your 9-5, small steps add up. Entrepreneurship is all about brave actions, networking, letting people know what you do. Lead yourself with an entrepreneurial mindset. 

6. Taking the First Step Toward Your Own Path

Leaving the 9-5 doesn’t happen overnight, but every big shift starts with one small step. Here’s how you can start today: 

Journaling Prompts to Gain Clarity 

Grab your pen and journal and start doing some deep inner work. 

  • If I knew I couldn’t fail, what would I do instead of my current job?
  • What fears are keeping me stuck, and how can I reframe them?
  • What are three small steps I can take this month toward my dream?
Practical Next Steps

Now think of what you can focus on right now. This is not a sprint, it’s a marathon. Breaking free from your 9-5 isn’t going to happen overnight. It’s going to take intention, commitment, courage, and strategy. It’s going to be built on small steps you take while still in your 9-5. It’s going to mean new habits, new schedules, learning new things, getting uncomfortable, before it all starts to fall together and you’ve built up enough confidence to fully break free.

Here are some small tips to focus on to help you build a strong foundation for success. 

  • Set up a savings plan to create a financial cushion.
  • Dedicate time each week to explore business ideas or side income. 
  • Find a mentor or community of women who have left their 9-5.
  • Take action—apply for a freelance gig, start a blog, or launch a small offer. 

Next Steps

I’d love to hear from you—what’s one fear holding you back from leaving your 9-5? Book a free 30 minute Momentum Call and let’s figure out how to set you up for success. We’ll go over the 3 pillars to see where what next steps will be best to get you started!